Letting Off A Little Steam...

Had occasion to hit several different bars, pubs, and associated beverage dispensers over the last several days, and realized I had accumulated a litany of gripes and bitches and observations that I needed to divest myself of. So here goes.

The trouble with bars/lounges/pubs these days...is the same exact trouble that's always been present: most of these people don't have the slightest clue what they are doing!

Shame, really. And it reflects on not only the bartenders and waitresses but the managers and owners who either don't know---or worse, just don't care---about the right way to do things.

Over the last several days I've seen the following, in a range of establishments, so it's endemic and I won't mention any single place.

Young lady asks if I know what I want. Gin and tonic, I say. "You want just a rail drink, right?" Well, depends, whataya have, I respond? "Oh, we got three or four. Want me to find out."

This young lady obviously works cheap, and gets paid an appropriate amount for her services. And no one has made an effort to train her, either.

Never assume somebody wants a rail drink! And never go out of your way to sell down when you don't need to. Assume you've got a discerning customer here (or at least pay him the compliment). No, you don't need to push things on him, but you can discreetly go for the upsell. "Is there a particular gin you like, sir? Tanqueray, Beefeater?"

And they had only four gins on the back bar, so she shouldn't have had to "find out". (I could see them from where I was sitting.) She should have known already. Turns out that they had Plymouth Gin there. Who would have guessed, eh, in a standard blah bar setup? Of course, she could have just rung up another rail G&T and been happy with it (along with the lower tip.)

I go into a pretty lively bar. The bartender is friendly and amiable, so I ask for a Whiskey Manhattan (it was in Milwaukee; I had enough sense to specify whiskey so I wouldn't get brandy instead); saw they had Woodford Reserve Bourbon, so I ordered a Woodford Manhattan. He comes back to report that they're out of Woodford, so would Knob Creek be okay? For devoted whiskey drinkers, there's a world of difference between Woodford and Knob Creek, so it's good he asked. But why did they run out of Woodford, early on a Saturday evening on a holiday weekend? Somebody's not paying attention to business.

To add personal insult to injury, when I got distracted by the whiskey that wasn't there, I neglected to specify what kind of Manhattan I preferred. So the young man automatically whipped up a watered down lowball, rocks and water (I was in Milwaukee, remember; this is standard there). Okay, my bad---but he should have asked.

In another bar, I did remember, and I did ask for "a Whiskey Manhattan, please? And Up?" Young lady looked at me and said, "What's that?" What's what, I replied. "Up. What's that mean?" She had no idea what I was talking about, and had apparently never taken an order for anything but a lowball rocks drink. I explained "Up", and she cheerfully thanked me, so it's not like she didn't have the ability and willingness to learn her trade. It's just that no one took the time to teach her anything about what she was doing.

Another gripe---and this is one that continually irritates me---is when I walk into a bar, glance at the back bar, then look at the printed bar list just to verify what I already knew: whoever managed the place had been lazy (or just plain stupid; or both) and had let one distributor rep write the whole stale, standard blah list. It was painfully obvious. As a result the bar did not in any way reflect reality, or customer demand, or any sense of style or distinction. It was filled with gaping holes and lame choices put there to satisfy someone's quota for the month. If you go to the trouble of starting up a business that depends on a bar for revenue, at least put some thought into what you're pouring from the bar, you idiot.

Finally---and aren't you glad this rant is almost over?---there's the continuing failure of even good bars to understand that to make good drinks you absolutely have to have good Vermouth!

It is astonishing to me when in establishments that clearly should know better, places that have gone to great lengths and great expense to stock ultra premium spirits and develop elaborate cocktail programs----and then they buy the cheapest brand possible of Vermouth!?! What's up with that? Fifty whiskies on your proud list, and all you have is $2.00 vermouth? Not only no variety; no quality in the one you do have. What, like it doesn't matter? No cocktail is any better than the ingredients used to make it. And if you don't have a selection of quality vermouths, you're not making good cocktails.

Okay, that's it. Thanks. I feel a lot better now.

The Battle of the Belges, Stone Soup and Fat Squirrels

Visited Milwaukee this past weekend, so the theme was beer. None of it was from Milwaukee though.

The first night we ended up at Point East Pub; I'd heard about the incredible wings, so I figured I'd even brave the cigarette smoke (which unfortunately was at the fumigatory level, ech) and check 'em out. They were...incredible. Some of the best wings I've ever had. Twice cooked, loaded with spice---but more spice than sheer heat. Anybody can do hot; takes a good recipe to do spice, with balanced heat.

They had a panoramic selection of beer at PEB, and good wings deserved good beer, so first up was a Chimay Red. The bartender apologized and said all he had on hand was a Duvel glass; I laughed and said I'd let it slide this once. Great ale; tart apricot fruit on the nose, but red plums, red plums, red plums in the mouth, with a tincture of herbal sappiness and a lovely cinnamon-nutmeg dustiness, all wrapped up with a tart/sweet/sour/bitter finish.

And hey, since I already had a Duvel glass, heck, why not a Duvel?!? I'll tell you up front here: I'm not impartial when it comes to Duvel. I love the stuff; it's easily one of my favorite brews. And this iteration didn't let me down one bit. It was creamy and pleasantly bitter and drenched in tart fruit. Perfect, absolutely perfect, with the wings, and over the top with the sweet potato fries. And word: Duvel is great with food too.

Next day was the long awaited Green Bay-Minnesota game at Lambeau, so we ended up in front of a giant tv screen watching most of Wisconsin get depressed---but to salve our spirits we sucked down some beer from New Glarus Brewing Company.

I had heard good things about the cool couple at New Glarus, and been urged to try their brews, so this was my chance. Sure glad I did: These people are making some great beer down in southern Wisconsin, and I'm now a big fan.

The first was Stone Soup, billed as a Belgian-style ale. And it was. It was actually as close to being a la Belge as any American micro I've ever had. Very similar to the Chimay Red, with tart fruit and spice. This is a beer I could fall in love with. Great balance, and an even greater lingering finish that brings you back for more.

The next one, Fat Squirrel, was just as impressive in its way. It was a soft, fat, slightly caramel/chocolate nut brown ale, with a hazelnut for the nut and some pumpernickel for the brown, and just the right touch of hops to keep things tight and tasty. Liquid bread, baby!

Keep your eye on New Glarus. This is beer worth looking for. They're two for two with me. (They also make a Cracked Wheat, but I didn't try that. My son, who inhaled it, did say it was pretty good though.)

And say what you will (and I know you will), Favre came to play on Sunday. Gotta give him that.

Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.

Great American Distillers Festival, Portland OR--- J Witty Chamomile Gourmet Organic Liqueur

The Liqueur/Cordial category is sort of a catch all of spirits---it's purposely designed to include pretty much any spirit you wish to use, any flavor or combination of flavors you wish to use, and it allows you to make the final spirit in any way you wish as well. Indeed, it's commonly known that some liqueurs are no more than synthetic flavors dumped into flavorless alcohol vats, stirred, and bottled.

The only thing liqueurs need have in common, in fact, is that they all have to contain sugar (from 2.5% to 35%, to be exact.) And even there, the type of sugar isn't specified!

Designed originally as medicines, tonics and restoratives (cordialis--of the heart, from concoctions designed by the alchemists to stimulate and revive the failing organs and appetites and desires of their wealthy patrons; and while we are in the etymological frame, liqueur comes from Latin liquifacere, to melt or soften), liqueurs eventually became fashionable as after-dinner drinks and liquid desserts.

The current fashion for mixology immediately fixed on liqueurs as a particularly good source for intense flavors---and not coincidentally useful for adding sugar to some of their concoctions---and there never seems to be a limit to the number of flavors that can be produced for the public fascination (St. Germain Elderflower,anyone?). So liqueurs remain popular for entrepreneurial purposes---and since the sky's the limit on rules, a liqueur can be as simple or as profound, as perfunctory or as magical, as the producer wishes it to be.

Enter J. Witty, a worldly and well traveled restaurateur who divides her time between California and Portland and is consumed by an interest in good taste derived from natural products. After several years of experimentation and persistence, she managed to come up with a perfect concoction that not only uses all natural products, but also expresses a unique flavor statement:

J Witty Chamomile Gourmet Organic Liqueur.

Where most liqueurs are mass-produced by large corporations and generally (okay, almost exclusively) use synthetic chemicals and manufactured essences on top of the simplest and cheapest of grain neutral spirits (translation: as little flavor as possible, made as cheaply as possible), Witty insists on top quality and organic botanical components.

But when the philosophy is stripped away, and only the flavor is left, the flavor becomes the most important thing. So how does the J Witty Chamomile Liqueur taste?

Pretty damned good!

Witty wisely elected to stay relatively low on the sugar scale---I'm not sure what the precise level is here, but it's a lot closer to the 2.5% minimum than the 35% maximum sugar. And perhaps more importantly, it's a softer, gentler style of sweetening from agave nectar and cane sugar that is in harmony with the pleasantly delicate aromas and flavors of the chamomile and spice base. This would be perfect as a light, slightly sweet, delicate after-dinner drink, or used judiciously to enhance and expand the flavor of a cocktail.

On a side note, and circling back to the original philosophy espoused by Witty, the chamomile dregs left after the fermentation and distillation process is complete are provided to local Portland gardeners as a fragrant compost, thereby completing the cycle back to the earth.

So: good quality, responsibly made, and totally sustainable. What more could you ask of a liqueur? Perhaps, another serving?

Oh, and the next time your Great Great Aunt smiles as she gently sips her Chamomile Tea---you might look at how she sweetened it.

For more information, go to www.jwittyspirits.com

Great American Distillers Festival, Portland OR---Tuthilltown Distllers, Hudson Valley, New York

I knew about the cheese. I knew about the foie gras. I didn't know about the whiskey until now.

Having attended the 5th Annual Great American Distillers Festival in Portland OR, I got to learn

about---and taste---the whiskies of the Hudson River Valley.

Tuthilltown Spirits, located on the aptly named Gristmill Lane in Gardiner, NY, has a thriving distillery operation that is turning out some interesting variations of American Whiskey. (They make some other intriguing products, but at this event had only the whiskies.)

Gable Erenzo, Distiller and Brand Ambassador for Tuthilltown, was on hand with some of his apothecary bottles for some spirited show-and-tell. There were three whiskies on display---a "Baby" Bourbon made from 100% Corn, but otherwise adhering to the rules for Bourbon; a Manhattan Rye Whiskey, with a 100% Rye mashbill; and a Four Grain Bourbon Whiskey, composed of Rye, Corn, Wheat, and Malted Barley.

The Baby Bourbon was redolent of corn right enough, with a sweet, sweet nose and mild caramelly/toffee notes from the barrel maturation. Not terribly complex, and a bit too simple for my tastes, but I can see that it would be a gentle introduction to American Whiskey and the Bourbon category, and perhaps suited to mixed drinks.

The Manhattan Rye was very much the opposite end of the whiskey spectrum: bold, spicy, and with a considerable bite! It too was indicative of its single grain, and reminiscent of the long lost heritage of American Rye whiskies from before Prohibition, when Rye was the dominant whiskey consumed. Not for the faint of heart, with its robust attack, strong spicy character, and full throttle flavor, it would be a perfect teaching tool to learn about the basic nature of the different grains in whiskies. And as billed, it might be great in a classic Manhattan, with some sweet vermouth and a cherry to soften and tone down a few of the rustic edges.

Since the maturation cycle is not mentioned, I'm not sure whether there is any beyond the required minimum, but in the case of the Rye, I'd certainly be interested in seeing what greater maturation would reveal.

(Note to Tuthilltown: I'd also love to see the barrel and maturation info detailed on your website, guys. When you're dealing with whiskies, the specifics of how you mature and how long you mature are crucial, and it would be a good thing to dwell a bit on those details.)

The real proof though was in the Four Grain Bourbon. The judicious blending of the mash bill of raw ingredients is one of the most important flavor sources for any whiskey, and the distillers at Tuthilltown have down a fine job here, with a balanced mashbill designed to 'fill in the flavor holes' that one or the other grains alone might create. In the Four Grain, you have the warmth, without too much heat, the sweetness, the spice, the fire, and the lovely addition of vanilla/caramel oak over time. A commendable Bourbon, and one that bartenders and mixologists would have fun playing with in their concoctions.

Looks like now I'm going to have to visit the Hudson River Valley. After all, they have all the necessary food groups there, and it should be easy to get a decent drink!

For more information, go to www.tuthilltown.com

Great American Distillers Festival, Part 2---Montana Whiskey by RoughStock Distillery

There's something rare and special about a truly well made whiskey. You can argue all day long (and whiskey lovers do) about Scotch and Bourbon and Canadian, but good whiskey is simply good whiskey wherever you find it.

And I found a good one from Montana.

Bryan and Kari Schultz are a young couple from Montana, fresh-faced and clear-eyed and friendly, quick with honest warm smiles and eager to show off their new whiskey.

RoughStock Distillery is an all-Montana production near Bozeman, dedicated to small batch craft whiskey.

The barley malt and the fresh water come from Montana (and so do the Schultzes); the copper still comes from Kentucky, where such things are made, along with the requisite white oak barrels, where such things are also made.

The whiskey has just recently been released...you can currently get it in Montana, but you'll have to wait until Bryan and Kari get it distributed out to other areas, because there's not a lot of it right now and it has to work its way out through the system of distribution to other states.

But when you can get it: Get it! For a young whiskey with not a lot of maturation time, this is remarkably good, well made, and balanced whiskey, folks. Once production ramps up a bit more, and Bryan has some further time to develop aged stock, I suspect some of the slight rough edges will soften with maturation and mellow out with added complexities. Not to say the whiskey isn't drinking well right now---it's surprisingly smooth for its age, with a soft vanilla and spice finish, and would be a good sipping whiskey, as well as a base for some enterprising cocktails.

So when you see Montana Whiskey (the first Montana Whiskey since Prohibition!) pop up on the local retail shelf, or on the back bar of your favorite watering hole, don't be shy. I think you'll be impressed when you try it. I was! Now I'm thinking it would be great in a classic (i.e., freshly made by someone who knows what they're doing) Old Fashion. Or perhaps a softer-sided Manhattan with a little touch of cherry juice? Hey, let's make a "Montana Smash!"

RoughStock Distillery Montana Whiskey (www.montanawhiskey.com)

And if you're up around Bozeman, give Bryan and Kari a jingle. My bet is you'll get a warm Montana welcome.

5th Annual Great American Distillers Festival---Part 1

If you missed the 5th Annual Great American Distillers Festival in Portland, OR, this past weekend, you missed a chance to meet some devoted artists and craft people doing what they love---making and concocting very personal small batch spirits.

You also missed some of Oregon's best bartenders and mixologists at work crafting their own concoctions from the artisanal spirits!

Held in the Bossanova Ballroom (722 E Burnside) in Portland, the Festival was a cozy affair, allowing up close and personal interaction with many of the distillers themselves. And the only thing artisanal distillers like as much as creating their spirits is talking about their spirits, so there was lots of animated interchange going on.

Meanwhile, up on the stage, there was a continuing series of mixology competitions, with the primary stipulation for the contestants to use the spirits available to impress the judges---with courtesy sampling of the tasty and innovative results for the extremely appreciative audience, thank you very much. It was intriguing to see the mixologists at work in their cocktail laboratories, quickly and efficiently assembling the oft times complicated cocktails.

As you might expect here in the epicenter of cuisine culture of the Pacific Northwest, there was a strong emphasis on freshness and purity of flavor, as well as use of local ingredients. One drink I tasted depended largely on what was available in the local farmer's market that morning, for other than the spirit base it was primarily freshly sourced or personally produced. And why shouldn't your cocktail from the bar reflect the local and fresh products of the region, just as the food menu from the kitchen does?

But the base of every cocktail is the spirit...and there were spirits aplenty in this Halloween season, from the homegrown to some far flung places like Colorado, Montana and New York.

And every single spirit category was represented too (if you include the agave syrup used as sweetener to represent tequila, since it isn't legal to produce tequila anywhere but the approved areas in Central Mexico). Plenty of vodkas, as you might expect, but numerous gins, liqueurs, brandies, whiskies and rums too.

Although I'm not personally fond of most flavored vodkas, since they tend to be simple infusions of compounded essences imposing a flavor on neutral grain spirits, there remains an art to it, and it certainly does appeal to the masses. And I'll admit there were some creative infusions---roasted cocoa beans for chocolate vodka was a big hit, and a black truffle infused vodka got some attention too.

But let's take a closer look at some of the spirits, and the distillers who craft them, in following posts.